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Self-Discipline | How to Break Bad Habits | Form Good Habits | Real Talk- Thomas DeLauer

Self-Discipline | How to Break Bad Habits | Form Good Habits | Real Talk- Thomas DeLauer

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so any habits that you have good or bad they’re actually pretty easy to identify it pretty easy to break but in that same vein it’s actually pretty easy to instill a good new habit and it comes down to three really simple things okay so when we start understanding how habits work we can identify so many little things that we have good and bad habits towards now some of the things that I recognize with myself is when I get to the office I have a habit of going and having some matcha green tea and then I get rolling through my day and it’s it’s like I’m seeking a reward from that now that’s not a bad thing but it’s just a simple example it’s like I have my cue then I have the action and then I have the reward and psychologists have talked about this before it’s actually pretty common so it’s actually broken down into three parts they’re literally with every habit is it cue there is an action and there is a reward so a cue is also known as a trigger so for me for example with that my cue or my trigger is I walk into the office I may have like a sense of the smell of the office the the way it looks things like that and then my immediate action is to go and get myself some matcha and that’s sort of my action and then I get the reward and the reward is kind of twofold in this case so in this case the reward is literally consuming something like I actually get the effect from the food itself but then I also get a dopamine hit just from satisfactory like response like right I feel really good because I just completed the task I completed the action so when you look at every single habit that you have they all come down to these simple three things so again if we understand our cues our triggers we understand our actions and we understand what the reward that we’re trying to get out of something is it makes life really easy so an example in a bad way is gonna be like smoking or drinking right okay you get that same kind of thing you have a cue maybe it’s getting home from work that’s your cue and psychologically that’s just your cue to take an action so you take an action you drink or you smoke and then you have your reward your reward in the case of smoking and drinking is really really simple okay you’re getting literally a physiological response that’s giving you kind of a neurotransmitter high you’re getting and a acetaldehyde response from alcohol and you’re getting any kind of neurotransmitter response from nicotine so there you go there’s your reward and that’s kind of hijacked because we have sort of that physiologic response that comes from a drug but it’s still the same sort of thing now here’s where it becomes a problem to develop good habits good habits things like meditation or working out or eating right have sort of a delayed reward okay so the whole trifecta is completely thrown off so normally you have your cue you have that action and the reward that all happens boom boom boom but with exercise for example you can set up a cue you can set up a trigger you can put your you know gym bag by your door so you have a trigger to go to the gym you go to the gym you take the action but other than a little bit of an endorphin response right afterwards you don’t get the reward that you’re truly seeking it’s delayed gratification and there’s been a lot of studies that have looked at delayed gratification and it takes a special kind of individual to really process delayed gratification and really benefit from even delayed gratification but the fact is is that if you still understand the cue and you understand the action and you understand the reward you can still develop the overall cycle and that’s what we really need to focus on so what about breaking a bad habit though because this is what’s really tough okay a lot of people will tell you that you can’t break a habit you can never just stop doing something to break a habit but that’s total hogwash you absolutely can you can break a habit simply by neglecting that cue that trigger eventually that goes away and people will also tell you that once something is ingrained in your mind you’re always going to have that habit that is so not true it doesn’t work like that at all you see the brain has developed a habit it can get rid of that habit too it just takes time and once the brain is neglected of that specific cue sure you’ll have withdrawals because you’ll be wanting to have that response but again if you can just identify what the cue is and remove the cue it changes everything for you it truly can change everything so breaking a bad habit is as simple as removing yourself from the city people don’t like to think of it like that because it feels like you’re kind of hijacking it like you’re just not really where you’re jerry-rigging it you’re not truly fixing the problem but there’s a reason that methadone works right there’s a reason because it’s making it so that people are still getting some kind of reward some kind of dopamine response but they’re getting it without their recreational drug that’s harmful to their body they’re getting it through something that’s a little bit safer and allowing them to actually withdrawal in a safe controlled way so if we think of substituting something else for or something bad for something else in our life we think of it as sort of the healthy methadone in our own life that makes a big difference so I encourage you to do that now when it comes down to starting a new habit you need to create a new cue and you need to create a new action and need to identify the reward you can’t always create the reward so what I mean by that is if you want to get in the habit of meditating then you need to trigger something you need to have something that’s going to be a trigger for your meditation like what’s gonna trigger you to want to meditate then of course your actions gonna be the meditation but then you need to forcefully give yourself a reward why because you’re not going to see that immediate benefit from meditation same with working out right so it messes everything up so you gain the system a little bit give yourself a little piece of dark chocolate give yourself a little bit of a treat right when you’re done with the meditation now full disclaimer you’re going to start craving chocolate when you’re done with meditation now but that’s okay because at least you are getting the cue ingrained in your mind once the cue is ingrained in your mind you will take the action and the action of meditation or the action of exercise will far supersede the negative effect of that little piece of chocolate I promise you that you’re developing a bigger habit in spite of a small reward versus the complete opposite and eventually over time when you’ve seen body composition changes you can substitute that reward for the actual body composition reward that has occurred over time I hope that that makes sense but this is a very in-depth look at a very simple thing okay that simple cue that simple trigger is everything that’s everything when it comes down to just becoming a new person and making a true state change so sorry about driving in this I had to run some errands I wanted to make sure that I related topic that made a lot of sense for just everyday life as always make sure you keep it up locked in here in my channel if you have ideas for future videos you know where to put them I’ll see you soon

This Post Was All About Self-Discipline | How to Break Bad Habits | Form Good Habits | Real Talk- Thomas DeLauer.
Self-Discipline | How to Break Bad Habits | Form Good Habits | Real Talk- Thomas DeLauer

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Self-Discipline | How to Break Bad Habits | Form Good Habits | Real Talk- Thomas DeLauer… First, there is the cue, a trigger that tells your brain to go into automatic mode and which habit to use – it’s a trigger from the environment that tells your brain to go into autopilot and which habit to use. Then, there is the routine, which can be physical or mental or emotional action you take whenever presented with the cue. Finally, there is a reward, which helps your brain figure out if this particular loop is worth remembering for the future – it’s what you get from the habit that fulfills a craving in your brain.

Over time, this loop becomes more and more automatic – the cue and reward become intertwined until a powerful sense of anticipation and craving emerges.

When this pattern of “cue-routine-reward” gets repeated many times it becomes more and more automatic.

This is because the more we repeat it, the more it gets wired into our brains (in neuroscience, this is called “long-term potentiation”)

However, by better understanding habit loops, we can more easily disrupt the cycle and rewire our brains to new habits.

Every time a trigger precedes a habit, our brains strengthen the association between a habit and its trigger.

As an association between a habit and a trigger increases, the habit becomes more and more ingrained until we can perform our habits on full auto-pilot.

How to Create a Good Habit-

Many people fail to adequately reward themselves for taking action on a beneficial habit. Most addictive and destructive habits have a built in reward system that requires little or no input from you. Smoking or drinking are all easy habits to adopt because they light up your brain with the neurotransmitter dopamine (and a slew of other pleasure chemicals)

These substances naturally reward your brain and encourage continued usage even though they are harmful to your overall health. On the other hand, many positive habits such as exercise, meditation, focused work, and healthy eating don’t have immediately obvious rewards.

Yes, after extended practice, exercise, meditation, and focused work will all become activities that naturally stimulate your brain in positive ways and reward you for taking action, but they need a little bit of help to get started.

How to Break a Bad Habit/Change a Habit-

So what you need to do is identify your habit loop:


A trigger is defined as an event that kicks off the automatic urge to complete a habit – triggers are the key to forming new habits and breaking old ones, so simply put, triggers make the habit action happen.

A trigger can be anything in our environment which our brains associate with a habit – these contextual factors such as where we are, who we are with, and what just happened have a powerful and invisible effect upon our behavior. An understanding of our triggers is essential for an ability to break old habits – our old habits are constantly being reinforced by their triggers as we tend to repeat what we previously did in a similar situation. If the trigger for an old habit never occurs, the habit loop is interrupted – without repeated reinforcement, the association between habit and trigger weakens through neglect. Therefore, if we can eliminate our exposure to triggers for old habits, we can eliminate the habits themselves.

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